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The Chicago Rothschild

A comic tale from the Detroit Free Press about a boastful stranger who claims to be a millionaire when a hotel clerk asks him to pay in advance — a slice of vintage American tall-tale humor, cut short where the original page ends.

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Burlington Weekly Free Press · February 11, 1876 · Page 1

1 min read

DETROIT.

He hadn't any baggage, and after one look at him the brush-boy walked away and sat down. The average brush-boy of the average hotel knows when he can brush a quarter out of a guest, quite as well as a lawyer. The stranger wrote his name on the register with great deliberation. It was a long name. It read "Herbert Henry Washington, Chicago, Ill." The clerk regarded him for a moment with a keen glance, and then asked—

"How long will you remain here?"

"About a week," was the reply.

"Shall I credit you with $10 paid in advance?"

"Who are you talking to?" demanded the stranger, as he stepped back a little.

"Strangers generally pay in advance," replied the clerk.

"Well, sir, I'll be hanged, if I was ever insulted before! Ask me for money in advance! Why, sir, do you know that I could buy this hotel and still have millions left?"

"I have my orders."

"Am I to be treated like a dead-beat?" continued the stranger. "When a man comes to Detroit to lend $200,000 on a mortgage, do your people look upon him as a skulk and a thief?"

"My orders are positive," quietly replied the clerk.

"I want to see the owner of this hotel, and I want to take him to the Board of Trade, the Mayor's office, and the water works, and I want him to find out what kind of a man I am."

"The proprietor isn't in."

"You don't know me — you don't realize who I am!" exclaimed the stranger, tapping the office counter with every pause. "I didn't care to be known, but since you have insulted me I want to inform you that I am the Rothschild of the West!"

The clerk started off with a letter to his girl, but had only got as far as "beloved Sarah" when the stranger yelled out—

"Who advanced money to Chic[...]"

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