Not To Be Joked At

The other day a simple-minded German called on a grocer to pay his bill, giving him a $10 note. The grocer examined it and said, "Hullo, where did you get this note?" "Vot is de reason mit dose note?" replied the honest Teuton. "Don't she vash good, hein?" "Good!" answered the grocer, "why, you're in luck, man; that note is worth $10.50." "Ish dot so? Why for?" "You see the signature over here, don't you?" "Do you mean dose marks like a corkscrew mit de worms? Yah." "Well, that is Spinner's signature." "Veil." "Well, Mr. New is now Treasurer of the United States." "You don't tole me so, eh?" "Well, and notes signed by Spinner are getting scarce, and people pay five per cent more for them than the new issue." "By shiminy! ish dot so? Yes. Lemme see mein bills. Why, every one of them is a Spinner. Mein alive, mein fortune is made."

In pursuance of the grocer's advice, the German called at the Sub-Treasury on Saturday afternoon to get the premium on his bills. What success he had it is impossible to state, but he was seen later in the afternoon lurking around the streets by which the grocer would go home, and on being accosted by an acquaintance the following conversation ensued: "I say, mein friendt, der peoples from Shermany, dey vas fighters, eh?" "Oh, yes! the Germans are unquestionably a military nation of the first class." "Some big fights, hein?" "Yes." "Und Sadowa?" "Certainly." "Und Königgrätz?" "Certainly." "Und Gravelotte, und Mars la Tour, und Sedan?" "Of course, of course!" "Dose was all big battles, und der Deutsch—" "Yes." "Veil, you joost wait till dot grocery store shuts himself, und you saw a Deutsch victory yet dat makes you forget all dem little ones."